Window Peeking

Today being the last day of NaBloPoMo is something of a relief, I confess. Until maybe a week ago I was perfectly content to post everyday. I find that I have a lot I want to say, go figure!

I was asked recently about my involvement with a website I touted early in my blogging career called Mary Kay Sucks so in the interest of clarity I thought I would post about that today. I stumbled upon blogging about a year ago and decided to begin Mrs Metaphor on a literary lark so to speak. I wanted to spend some time developing my writing skills and developing the “character” of Mrs Metaphor. I had in mind what I *thought* this might entail and was suprised and a little shocked at the level of emotional frenzy resident in the cyberland experience to be frank. Perhaps if I had contented myself to spend time on the blogs of my friends (real life and internet bound) then I would have found things a little more tame or even edifying, although that BabyChaos and Writerchick really know how to throw a wild party.

I ended up spending a lot of my time at Mary Kay Sucks (which later became Pinktruth and died a little creative death in the process.) The bad part about spending so much time at the anti-Mary Kay site was that it was like working at a crisis center. It began to feel so polarized…Mary Kay:bad, People who hate Mary Kay: Good. In general I believe that polarizations are rarely accurate so to be whipped into such and emotional turmoil about the inner workings of a cosmetics company felt a little off after a while.

The truth is, that I lost myself on that site. I was already sporting a literary character as my identity rather than the real me and then to pile atop that the tenor of the website in question, well…I lost myself. The good thing about spending time at MKS was that I did make some really amazing “cyber” friends, most of whom are my commentary fanclub here…and for which I am most appreciative.

Needless to say that I ended up really needing to quit the “crisis center” blog because of the emotional drain it had become. I do not begrudge the women who still want to “work” there or still want to attend the support groups but I was never really in a position to be the voice of reason or wisdom there. I’ve never sold Mary Kay…and to be honest, I don’t actually believe it to be evil now that I’ve jumped off the bandwagon. I’ve not been terribly adept at bandwagon riding. It gets a little crowded.

What is it about blogs that continues to fascinate us, draw us in, make us care for people we’ve never met and probably never WILL meet? As I continue to expand my internet blogging community I find I am increasingly filled by the words I read and perhaps at the same time weighted by the additional information. It can become overwhelming to keep up. I feel like a “bad” blogging friend when I don’t keep up with what is happening around me.

Alas, posting this month has given me a new appreciation for those of you who actually do post on a regular basis. It is a great deal of work! I was suprised, however, and glad that I didn’t run out of things to tell you about…although some might argue that I was “reaching” at times (read: Italian spiderman….come ON, that was GREAT!)

So, thank you for peeking into this window during the month of November. I was considering posting each day in December just to keep the party going but at this point I think I’d prefer the pace which fits me better, inconsistent and random. : )

Keep checking in with me, I have enjoyed our ride together this month!

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51 thoughts on “Window Peeking

  1. YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay for you Mrs!!!! A whole month of staying on task. GO YOU! With all that you have going on in your life (those 20,000 kids you have running around LOL) you did GOOD!

    I like how you refer to PT like crisis center…I just couldn’t stay “mad” at MK. And I wanted to help people get out of MK if that is what they wanted, but there was so much emotional drainage that it became too much after a while. I remember one day I woke up and realized I didn’t hate MK anymore and thought – WHEN DID THAT START?

    For that I am grateful. I came full-circle and it felt GOOD!

    I did the same group think as you w/MK. People who like MK: bad. People who hate MK: good. I FINALLY got out of that mode (praise the Lord!) and realized that MLMs aren’t for me and I can ONLY live my life. I tried to help women based on my experience and I believe I did to a degree. Recruiting still makes me antsy (not a good topic to disucss around me) but as for selling….there are worse products out there than MK and there are better products. MK does give women choices in the skin care line/glamour/body product they choose to use and choices for women are a good thing.

    I DID meet you and MANY others there and I am grateful for that.

    One thing I learned through this last year of blogging is that we are all human beings trying to survive in our own way. MK or not. I have a greater respect for THAT then ever before.

    Love ya girlfriend!

  2. Yeah, Mrs. Metaphor! You done good!

    I was in such a crisis center mode on the PT discussion board too. I thought that people were going to DIE if I wasn’t constantly checking in on them. I was on suicide watch, and I am not even kidding. It was exascerbated by being in charge of all posts/emails/inquiries in Spanish and feeling like people NEEDED me to prevent them from DYING. Ironically, my PT metaphorical death was my release from that sensation.

    *wipes brow* Well, I am certainly glad that I met you and so many others during that time. Keep on blogging, at your own pace.

  3. Mrs. M – congratulations!! You made it! i tried to be a voice of reason in the “crisis center” when I could, tried to ask questions, offer help, and sometimes let the antis see the pros side. Never worked, and ultimately got the boot, and am over it. Thsoe who really think they find help there are welcome to it, just as those who wallow in self-pity are welcome to do so. I, however, and grateful that I have found the far more uplifting blogs of Mrs. Metaphor, Fighting Windmills, and, of course, DUH!!

  4. Before PinkTruth existed, I never knew that there was a place where I could talk about my crazy experience with Mary Kay. I thought I was all alone, and I was going a little crazy beating myself up over things that I did, and I do take complete responsibility for them, but I had a heapin’ helpin’ of encouragement to do them thanks to the not-so-lovely women who would benefit from them in Mary Kay.

    I, too, went crazy on PinkTruth, because up until that time there was nobody else who would have cared or understood what I went through. It felt good to get my facts out where people could read them. It helped some, ticked off a few, and entertained a couple. The women there helped me.

    There came a point when life became too hectic, and I stepped away from the board. But, I will tell you this: I will be forever grateful to Tracy for starting it, and I can honestly say that I believe it healed my little piece of drama to be in that environment.

    I do think there does come a point, though, where what one needs to say has been said, and then it is time for that person to move on. I moved on, but I still have very fond memories of my sheer JOY over discovering a group of disgruntled former and current Mary Kay people. Doubtless, others will discover it for the first time, share their stuff like we did, and perpetuate its existence.

    I still have a couple of friends in that frickin’ company, and I know they see everything that’s being called out on the carpet at PT. I still think the company IS corrupt nowadays, but I’m not gonna get in a blog war about it. I still think that ALL MLM companies have the serious flaw in them that once you get involved, you are stuck with those friends and that product for life if you want to be successful–so, it IS like a cult in that regard–e.g., you can wear any jewelry, for example, as long as it’s Premier or Cookie Lee. MLM’s close you off from a lot of other opportunities, again, IMO. I still think my former NSD is the greed machine incarnate, even though others think she is nothing but pure magic. My former senior director still SUCKS. My former director still needs prayers … and lots of them. My former senior director really f’d her over, IMHO. Anyone who says, “Oh, but she let her ‘f’ her over can kiss my butt.” There’s a whole lot more to it than that. And, maybe you just don’t know that unless you’ve been there. I was there, and I’m sayin’, there’s a whole lot more to it. I hate it when people discount the pink “pain factor.”

    But, you know, who even cares about what I think? I’m typing this mostly for my own benefit and to complete my goal of supporting “the mrs” every day! Thanks for bringing up the topic, because it helps me wrap up a couple of loose ends. I have got it all off my chest now, and I can blame mrsmetaphor for bringing it up! What could be better?

    I made a few good friends over at PinkTruth, met a couple of fickle folks, and some others. I hope that Tracy finds the niche she’s looking for, and if she happens to make some money doing it because it does help people, well, good for her.

    Anyway, mrs., it’s been real. Congrats on achieving 30 days of consecutive blog topics. You’re a trouper! On to bigger and better things now. No doubt. I will see you around, chickie!

  5. I was only there a couple of times and didnt feel too welcome. But I love you all and I don’t even know you but it seems as if I do..Mrs. I started blogging this summer after I got on PT accidentally and I am glad because it led to finding all of you. Thanks for all you’ve done this month to my ‘poor ole brain’.(well, it did need some exercise) honestly, Your blog is unique. I have enjoyed it mucho!
    LOL!

  6. Pinkbeefs,

    Again, you impress me. You are unafraid of calling things as they are and staying true to yourself and honest about your own experience and sharing your well-reasoned thoughts soundly. You seem not easily manipulated by others. At no time have I have seen you easily swayed by the fickle winds of public opinion (not the gentle breeze nor even the hurricane force vortex.) You go with your own flow. I appreciate that in you.

    Just saying… your book up there will likely momentarily piss off pissed off people. Depending on which way the wind is blowing this week. LOL. Funny thing though, your experience will likely ring true with many more folks than me. Kudos to you for sharing your thoughts and keeping it real.

    Ditto, PUR…
    Mrs M

  7. Hi Mrs, Thanks for an interesting month. I enjoyed logging in before I started work and sat with a cup of the demon bean reading your topics. Everyone who contributed to PT has a story to tell, yup sometimes it was crazy, but that is what brought about healing for many. I think it is just a short rest for most on their journey and then they move.

    Many ex IBC’s and SD’s, TNT, SicknPink, SuzyQ, PUR, Pinkbeefs, Marvie, just to name a few have helped many by healing their injured hearts on PT. Everyone has benefitted by their words and validated much of what IBC’s were saying and feeling. I think there is more middle ground to the MLM argument, there are those it works for and those it doesn’t, so maybe there should be a live and let live attitude that prevails, instead of the all or nothing attitude that was prevalent on the blogs. Anyway that is for another day.

    Thank you for 30 interesting days, please don’t leave it too inconsistent, now you have Mrs. Metaphor junkies out there who will need their fix.

  8. Thank you, PUR. Thank you, HH. I think the words of “Free,” above, sum it all up quite eloquently: “One thing I learned through this last year of blogging is that we are all human beings trying to survive in our own way. MK or not. I have a greater respect for THAT then ever before.”

    We’ve ALL experienced a lot, and that’s about all I have to say on the matter, except that all the lessons learned were extremely valuable. We all “rode the (cyber) wave(s) and lived to talk about it!”

  9. I can appreciate challenging points of view on an issue in a great debate, but the personal attacks — especially by name — to sway public opinion one way or the other has just been ridiculous. I found that the sting of a flippant comment hurts. And I know I have thrown around my own zingers and felt moved to make amends where possible. So I cannot imagine how tough it has been for those who had been dragged through the mud in blogs by name.

    So am I reading this thread right? Does this mean that folks who actively participated in the bashing of other folks who lead or make up the community of PT (or lead or make up the sales force of MK) in the last year are now regretting the derth of horrible things posted about (let me quote this out of context to make my point here) “…other human beings who are just trying to survive in their own way…?” Could this thread be interpreted as sorta like a mass public apology? No more spiteful personal attacks on others for sport? No matter how hard the wind is blowing or what position is held on an issue this week?

    I sure hope so. And I also hope forgiveness is possible.

    I still think I’d be old and gray and a wee bitter if I were to wait for all apologies I feel I am owed in life because that’s just not going to happen. It is quite a thing, though, to work through honestly with someone who is able to get real for a second and say the words “I’m sorry…” for their spiteful actions. Or to actually converse with someone who is willing to talk through a simple misunderstanding instead of making all kinds of assumptions. But that is just the first step. Because an apology is only one step toward honest remorse, different behavior, growth, and from that a mutual understanding.

    I am enjoying the thoughtful and respectful nature of the posts at “that Metaphor” blog. Although I don’t hope to see anyone morphing into a People of Metaphor. Just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

    Mrs, I do wholeheartedly agree that bandwagon behavior and empathetic compassion for others are pretty much mutually exclusive. Anywhere in life.

  10. HH, thanks for acknowledging me. And Beefy for calling my quote eloquent.

    PUR, I’m not sure who you were asking about my quote, me or beefy. Since it was mine originally I’ll just tell you what I meant. HH brought it up one day in a conversation and it just made so much sense. She posted about it on PT but I think it got lost in translation (correct me if I got this wrong HH). It was something about where you buy your products and are looking at it from every angle, in that, do you check out every product you buy? If it is made in a sweat shop, which most of us think is horrible, when you look at the other side of the coin, without that job a mother may not be able to feed her children. It was an all encompassing question when you took time to think about it. There were more than 2 sides to that coin. There were many many sides.

    So, if I was not willing to weigh the cost of EVERY item I purchased then who was I to scathe at someone who placed an order with MK??? In that one comment of HH’s, I learned a squillion lessons and one of them was that we are ALL just trying to survive in our own way. MK or not.

    I’m also with you. I will never hear every apology I think I should receive. And thankfully that is not for me to decide, I’m human afterall and would get it all wrong. Jesus died on the cross for my salvation and my rewards do not lie with people, but with Him and I’m cool with that.

    Have a fab evening everyone! 🙂

  11. FFPT you got the quote right. I think we all have lessons to learn from everything we do. I also think we need to stop looking for the perfect apology, because I don’t think we will ever find a perfect apology because people aren’t perfect. It doesn’t have to be wordy. I think we for get it is usually two little words “I’m sorry” which should be enough, because if we truly mean those two little words and your heart is in it, that should be enough. Somettimes you have to walk to the center of the bridge and put out your hand in friendship, hopefully the other person or people will be there to take hold.

  12. Like I said, I was quoting out of context to make a different point. Clearly, it was completely out of context. But it makes my point no less valid.

  13. Beefs… love that “fickle folks” reference. I just do. FIckle is one of those funny f words that becomes so much funnier when paired with a lot of other f nouns and verbs. Flounce is a good one. That word still makes me LOL.

  14. Dear mrs., I want to address this paragraph of yours, because I used the posts above to purge myself of a few things I’d been carrying around for awhile. I’m probably going to do the same thing again. Just a warning.

    “What is it about blogs that continues to fascinate us, draw us in, make us care for people we’ve never met and probably never WILL meet? As I continue to expand my internet blogging community I find I am increasingly filled by the words I read and perhaps at the same time weighted by the additional information. It can become overwhelming to keep up. I feel like a “bad” blogging friend when I don’t keep up with what is happening around me.”

    1) Re the fascination – For me, it is the passion with which people present themselves and whether I have had any personal experience in that area. PinkTruth “hit” my buttons and, baby, they were HOT! It was the right thing at exactly the right time.

    2) Re the eventual “full-to-overwhelmed” feelings – Oh, absolutely. As PinkTruth took off, so did other blogs which could not resist the urge to opine on a number of topics important to them. I confess having followed several of them quite closely for awhile until I nearly imploded from being overinformed to the point of feeling unduly burdened–even about things I thought were none of my or the general internet community-at-large’s business.

    My days became consumed for awhile with what was said by whom, where, and whether or it was factual or not. Truly a waste of precious time I finally decided. For the most part, I wasn’t involved–just curious about where the real truth was–and I began to see that all accusers sometimes slipped into the same behaviors they were condemning.

    My favorite example is reading about garbage cans being knocked over in the heat of emotion. I snickered to myself as I thought how the fact that when I was in my early 30s I pushed a real live man about my same age (NOT a gentleman) over, flat on his can, in a retail establishment would be MUCH more interesting reading. He tried to rough-house his way past me in a walk to a newly opened check-out line–actually taking hold of my arm and pushing me against some merchandise so that HE could be first instead of me. (Poor sucker didn’t know that I had been working hard on upper body strength, have had a fair amount of experience working with unruly people, and that I have a non-existent level of tolerance for that kind of B.S. He should have just screamed by saying something like “I’m sorry, but I absolutely HAVE to get out of here first.) It’s not a moment I’m proud of, but it happened. It wasn’t a fair representation of my entire personhood, by any stretch of the imagination.

    I would have been mortified if I had read about my part in this incident on the Internet even as long as a year ago. Now, however, I see that I’m just another occasionally emotional person in the world who has made more than one mistake in life. I do feel that I made a statement that day, though, about what I will not put up with. lol While there is some morbid entertainment value in reading about stuff like this, there is also a point at where one’s personal convictions about what is fair get tested. I think that also contributes to the feelings of overwhelm.

    Anyway, I’m pretty sure that what I was trying to say with all of the above is that it’s satisfying to be able to write what you think online under a modest covering of anonymity. It’s also comforting to know that there are others out there who have experienced similar things and felt the same way about them. That’s why we’re drawn. At least some of us.

    I’ve learned a LOT in the last year or so about online human behavior and the need not to assume that I understand anyone or anything at all–especially since we’re all relatively anonymous and, therefore, “disposable” in each others’ lives. I think we all (including me) need to take heed to be a bit more gentle and tolerant–because we really don’t understand so much of what motivates other people and we don’t understand whether it is “fair” or “unfair” unless we’ve been in their place. (A quick aside here: apricotglazed, if you’re still out there, you need to pay your friend back–no matter the personal cost to you! I’m not talking about things like your situation.)

    So, anyway, it’s best to take everything we read with a grain of salt, never forget to keep it in perspective both for ourselves (as in “is this even really any of my business?” and in relation to the people writing (as in “how angry are they,” “about what,” and “why should I care?”) and being written about (as in “how old is this news,” “is it news or gossip,” and “does it really amount to a hill of beans in the big picture of how I view my relationship with the target?”) There is a LOT of energy expended in all these internal reasonings and determing whether it is worth contributing your own two cents’ worth of opinions. Again, more overwhelm.

    Most of all, I think we need to make good use of our reasoning faculties to add any balance that may be not be present. More cause for overwhelm. I have much, much more to say on this, but for the sake of peace, I will control myself. Sorry if I bored you or lost you. I just really needed to SPLORF this out into the blogging world. And, BTW, you’re not a bad person if you can’t comment on absolutely everything I’ve said. Seriously. You “know” me but you don’t “KNOW” me and that, therefore, makes it ok to just click on something else and go where your fancy directs you. It is simply too much to try to keep up with everything everywhere AND lead a productive non-virtual life.

    I’ve really enjoyed the month of November and posting here with all these wonderful folks including yourself. It is a unique blog, and I hope that you’ve found great value in completing the 30-day challenge yourself. See ya!

  15. Thank you for sharing, Pinkbeefs. You indeed have a backbone and continue to prove you are a goodly person. I can tell, even without overt declarations of faith or personal salvation. Your actions preach strong convictions guided by right, not mob mentality might. Though it sounds like you are quite capable of throwing some knock-out might around when necessary! LOL!!!

  16. HH I can agree with that. An apology from the heart is more than enough. Only the person offering the apology knows their true heart. As humans, we are generally able to tell if the apology was from the heart based on the actions to follow coming from the apologizer.

    PUR, to follow-up on your “clearly completely out of context” remark, I think that there are quite a few of us who have apologized in public and private to MKers who we offended and we have followed it up by our actions of not judging them based solely on their involvement w/MK. Many of us have become friendly, because somewhere along the way we figured out we’re just human beings trying to survive in our own way. MK or not.

  17. You can lead a horse to water…

    What about the relentless personal attacks, by name, of folks who lead or made up the community of PT? MK or not, doesn’t everyone deserve some measure of dignity, privacy, and common decency? On both sides of the issue. It is one thing to debate an issue or concept or how a “perfect” theoretical blog community or MLM business is run in actual practice… quite another to bash individuals by name for months on end. Even if they are an NSD or high up SD. Even if they merely participate in or run an internet forum.

    No matter which way the wind is blowing, or what we feel strongly about this week, certain behavior crosses the line no matter what side you are standing on today.

  18. And that is why I am enjoying this Metaphor place. Thoughtful discussion and soul searching. Transparency. And a peaceful exchange of ideas. Heavy or funny topics — difficult only because they are challenging to the intellect or just plain challenging to try to see something in another light and grow in a direction for the better. Because in the end we all just have to learn to laugh at ourselves and not be afraid to get a little bit humble and just plain get real enough to admit we’re not perfect. And say: “I’m sorry, y’all.”

  19. This is the second time you have bashed at me on here PUR (first reference to my salvation, second reference leading a horse to water). I do not consider that peaceful.

    If you have something you want to discuss with me privately, then by all means, go for it. Otherwise just consider yourself the bully on the playground.

  20. We can continue to keep score, or just get real for a second and a half. You have your beliefs, I have mine. I am stubborn, you are what you are. Let’s agree to disagree. However I just can’t help but judge your hypocrisies when it comes to relentlessly and publicly bashing folks by name. I am still having trouble trouble with that one. Be they NSDs or someone you once called friend. Maybe you renounce badmouthing MK folks, but I still see you engaging in the same behavior.

    And the bully on the playground remark is too funny coming from someone who recently said I “stink.” I do still chuckle at that one. Sheesh.

  21. Mrs. M,

    Here it is Dec.2 and I am just reading your last post. But Congrats to you for being a faithful blogger during Nov. I know that you have alot on your plate. I have enjoyed visiting that during the past month. I too hope that you wont be too random in your musings.

    Blessings on your journey. I will keep checking back.

  22. Ladies, ladies….please remember that many of my faithful readers have absolutely no context for understanding your disagreement. You are more than welcome to say your peace here but just know that there may be a few people who simply do not understand the blog war because they are not veterans of that particular skirmish.

    Let us all try to leave our baggage at the door as much as we are able. Forgiveness is merited for all and by all this season of Expectation and Hope, this season of Light.

  23. Hi, Mrs. M!

    This was an intriguing post. I appreciate your views on the issue of “polarity”, and, for the record, I’m almost, nearly inspired to begin my own 30-days of blogging…just because of stopping by today. lol

    Glad to see you’re still around!

  24. What is it about blogs that continues to fascinate us, draw us in, make us care for people we’ve never met and probably never WILL meet?

    Maybe it’s the chance for good, deep (or at least relatively unhindered) reflection on our everyday personal stories–or maybe it’s just that blogging is like alcohol. 😉

  25. #2 fightingwindmills-

    I hope you are no longer in crisis center mode, yes? Otherwise people with crises will always manage to seek you out and suck you dry wherever you choose to hang out. Please take care of yourself. *hugs*

  26. I think you hit the nail on the head Circle Reader, or it is like some other form of addiction. I think we need to remember what the side effects of excessive blogging are, real lost time, i.e. time we could have been spending with family/friends, time we could have been reading a book or doing something tangible, putting out too much information about ourselves that we would not otherwise disclose to strangers. Sometimes I think the cyber world melds into some people’s real-life world and there is a danger in that. The anonymity that we have and sometimes just let it fly. I enjoy blogging, its fun to chat with new people.

  27. HH-

    You are very wise. Online is just another form of communication, networking, and interaction with others and should be treated as such. Behavior anywhere, online or offline, absolutely defines who you are as a person. I am so happy to read your thoughts on this.

    All is forgiven. *tipping the nearest bellhop* You up for another round yet, HH?

  28. As long as it is a martini with two olives and an onion, shaken and not stirred please. Can we all sit around the piano and sing a tune or two as well?

  29. Thanks for looking out for me, PUR. Hugs to you too. If you all are turning this into a piano bar, I think I’ll just sit in the corner and drink Coors Light, like a good Virginian. (blogging is like alcohol–nice one, CircleReader)

  30. Singing Billy Joel’s rendition at the top of my voice sounding a little screechy.

    “Sing us a song your the Piano man, Sing us a song tonight, we are all in the mood for a melody…………..”

  31. WOW! For a minute there I thought I was somewhere else…Oh-I see some friends at the bar-going to get a Bud Light and join them. 🙂

    Mrs – Way to go on 30 days of blogging! I have always enjoyed it here!
    GO VOLS! Let’s kick some Wisconsin (wink) butt! Good ‘Ol Rocky Top! Go Big Orange!

  32. Mercedes… WOW!!!

    I’ll tip the bellhop for you… we’re checking our bags at the door. Besides, thanks to some brave souls it’s all just water under the bridge by now.

    *cue piano bar music*

  33. You got that right! I have real life problems to deal with on my bridge. Thanks for the tip-*nice music*-just came in for a drink-going back to my sick doggy now.

    WOOF!

  34. Thank you for sharing your insight on PT, Mrs. Sometimes I wish that I had stayed on as a Personal Use, getting orders once a year. Then I think, nah.. It wouldn’t be worth it. I’d still have tons of product just gathering dust and a CC bill collecting interest.

    Thank you all for helping me make an informed decision about sending my products back.

    Now if we are all bellying up to the bar, then give me a Kaluha and Cream. Or a Hot Chocolate with some Peppermint Schnapps.

  35. Congrat’s Mrs. I hope you are very pleased with yourself. I think it’s great when people can attain their goals. Way to go. I enjoy your peaceful blog a lot.

    love,
    pppj

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