missive: together

Dear one,

The idea of having it all “together” is a myth. You already know this deep down so I am really only here to remind you of this. It’s tempting to doubt this when we see people all around us who seem to have it all “together” but believe me, having it all “together” is a myth. “Having it together” is a transitional state at best.

The good news is that when we are falling apart, well, that’s transitional too.

If we lived alone on little islands somewhere it may be simpler to remember that things are shifting all the time. The tides moving, the hurricane coming, the trees bearing fruit. We’d remember each day that everything works in a cycle- and at the same time-nature is precocious. If we lived alone we’d have only this to compare ourselves, our lives, against. I reckon in this way we’d be able to see ourselves measured with the rhythm of the planet we inhabit and because that would be our measuring stick we’d know how small we are in the scope of things. Maybe we wouldn’t take things so seriously, we wouldn’t expect or hope to “have it all together” because we’d see what a Sisyphean task that becomes.

But we do not all live on little islands and that’s perhaps the best news of all, friend.

If living alongside nature reminds us that we’re a small cog in the planet’s ecosystem then living alongside people ought to remind us that we are also vital. We are a part of the greater story, the bigger picture, we have a place here. Living alongside people isn’t meant to be a set up for us to measure our shortcomings but perhaps rather a way for us to measure our ability to love and offer opportunities to love well.

This is what I have for you today, dear one. When you are tempted to measure yourself against someone you judge as “having it all together” and to see yourself as “less than” I want you to look inside, wrap your arms around the smallness of yourself in the bigness of the planet and then be reminded that each day is a chance to love and be loved.

Don’t forget-

mrs m.


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