“It’s amazing how we will never really see ourselves the way another person sees us,” Riley pondered as we drove one morning. We’d been to a portfolio review for a school she’d wanted to attend. One of the assignments was to do a self-portrait. As I drilled her on what the teachers asked and what the teachers said and how she responded in each situation she told me that they really liked her self-portrait. I imagine this is what ignited the thought about seeing ourselves.
Since then, I’ve been considering this. Riley went on to talk about this idea that always see ourselves through a lens, good or bad, that we can never be objective when we look in the mirror or see a picture of ourselves. “Even on video” she explained, “we see ourselves through the lens of knowing what we were thinking just then. We know why we said something a certain way or why we moved a certain way. We know how we felt.”
I wonder if perhaps this is why it is so hard for so many of us to really embrace the person we are. We know so much about ourselves and yet we know so little. Do we know what draws other people to embrace us? Do we value that too? Do we know, honestly, what the person on the outside sees and should it matter?
I really like that daughter of mine.